Engineers are examining whether they can close a failed blowout preventer by stuffing it with trash, said Adm. Thad Allen, the commandant of the Coast Guard. The 48-foot-tall, 450-ton device sits atop the well at the heart of the Gulf oil spill and is designed to stop leaks, but it has not been working properly since the oil rig Deepwater Horizon exploded April 20 and later sank."The next tactic is going to be something they call a junk shot," Allen told CBS's "Face the Nation" on Sunday. "They'll take a bunch of debris -- shredded up tires, golf balls and things like that -- and under very high pressure, shoot it into the preventer itself and see if they can clog it up and stop the leak. Because, you know, that's sounds like a good idea. Right? Right?"
What other tactics is BP is considering to plug the oil leak?
- Ignoring it. Ignoring it. IG-NOR-ING IT.
- Asking the government to call up Donald Rumsfeld and tell him WED's (weapons of environmental destruction) have reportedly been found in the Gulf of Mexico.
- Activating the TOM HANKS Signal!
- Letting a bunch of hippies protest outside the US Capitol building. That's usually productive AND helpful.
- After Optimus Prime defeats Megatron AGAIN they are going to drop his giant metal carcass on the broken well head and hope that plugs it up.
- Two words: SUPER GLUE.
- Another two words: GAY PARADE. (wait, what?)
- Having Virgil "Bud" Brigman ask his "new friends" to help out.
- My crazy Vietnam Vet neighbor "Stinger" said that if they had just let him, his boat, a case of Coors Light and 10,000 bags of hydraulic cement handle it, this whole thing would have been over before it ever started.
- Ask yourself: is there anything that tequila shots and a loaded 44 magnum CAN'T solve?
- Prayer. That shit works!
No comments:
Post a Comment